and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
