I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Randomize
