Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
