You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
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