apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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