yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
