ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
