One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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