sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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