I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Let's get the cat blown out
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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