I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Randomize
