Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
