this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Randomize