Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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