I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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