Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
