All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
