Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
How external is "for external use only"?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
