every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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