Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
Randomize