I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize