Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
