I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Randomize