I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
