Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I don't think brook has ever known best
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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