So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
