Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize