Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
