He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
