oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
