We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
