idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
