ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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