Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
