Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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