I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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