We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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