I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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