Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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