chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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