I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
