Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
