Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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