Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
