Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize
