ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize