how can u be prego again
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
