The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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