i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
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