At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
