I just made out with a guy for $7.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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